Monday, September 29, 2008

Blazing Epiphanies in Graduate School

Blazing By
Graduate school has picked up and I'm blazing through each week, wondering some days if I've even eaten breakfast. As the months shoot by toward Thanksgiving and Christmas, I find I can't wait to see my parents and Bear. Life in Richmond is fantastic amounts of fun, but I'm ready to be with people I love. Jocelyn came up to visit this weekend and we had a smashing fun time driving out to Mechanicsville in search of a clothing store. I was sad to see her leave this morning.

Realizations and Epiphanies
I came a realization on something, but don't judge me too harshly. I woke up this morning and realized that all through high school and my undergraduate career, I did what I thought everyone wanted me to do. I made perfect grades, I had perfect attendance and I fulfilled all the requirements to get into graduate school. The epiphany came when I realized I am unhappy doing this. I like being able to read whatever I want, on my timeline. I like being able to write what I want, without fear of being crushed for mild mistakes and I like being able to get to bed at decent hours without stressing about some assignment.

What I realized was this: I was glad I wasted the weekend with my friend instead of preparing for another round of schoolwork. I'm glad we ate noodles and watched sappy chick flicks instead of laboring over some obscure article or another. I know that may sound very childish and very selfish, but I think at some point, you've got to do what you want and stop stressing over what everyone else wants.
Holding the Line.
Bri

3 comments:

Jaye Patrick said...

There's nothing childish or selfish about it. It is courageous to admit it.

I saw quite a bit of this at University; kids in courses their parents and peers thought they should be in - and not what they wanted. They were the ones who eventually dropped out rather than change subjects. All that time and money wasted trying to please others.

Personally, I didn't go to uni until I was absolutely sure of what I wanted to do... which wasn't until I was four years out of high school.

Do what you feel is right and not from a sense of obligation.

Anonymous said...

Judge you?
Honey I celebrate you?
Hope you have a ball on upcoming vacations.
Waving at you from New York

Edmund said...

This can't work in fact, that is exactly what I consider.
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